The Cold That Wouldn't Stop It
Dec. 5th, 2022 08:50 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
jakebe
I've had this cold for about a week now, and I can't say I'm a fan.
Just when I think I'm feeling better, there's another coughing fit or another three gallons to evacuate from my nose. Breath isn't coming much easier, either, so that's no good. The only bright side is I hear it's been going around so there's a lot of sympathy and well-wishes. Everyone knows that you don't need COVID to have a fun time being sick. ;)
Despite that, it was a busy weekend! The trip to Gyu-Kaku was fun, though I think it's a style of eating best suited to smaller numbers. Even though there was only five of us, it was a little chaotic making sure all the cuts of meat were cooked to everyone's liking and that folks got full. I had a pretty good selection of beef, chicken, and garlic noodles -- but if it were up to me I would have had more!
The D&D game was really good, unexpectedly intense. The group has collected a general associated with the red dragon's army because we know he's connected to the abduction of many other dragonborn eggs(?) who were also born during the time of the Comet. Hildegaard, our dragonborn fighter, revealed that she grew up with him a long time ago, decided she would have none of Redrogomore's regime, and carved out her own path. It's possible that she was getting through to him before we realized we were being ambushed!
My character, the gnome rogue, immediately went to kill the prisoner -- which, it turns out, is not what the rest of the party wanted. It also set the trust-meter back quite a ways. However, the rest of the party cut his bonds, healed him up, and helped him escape while the dragon's army called him out as a traitor and demanded us to give him up so he could face justice. In the end, a few members of the party were taken into custody. A rescue/breakout session is on deck for next time!
On Sunday we hosted a few friends from out of town. We took them to a dispensary, which they loved, and The Counter -- a local burger joint that lets you "craft your own burger" from a list of options. Always a great time, nearly-impossible to make a bad burger if you know what you're doing. We took them to Dr. Funk, a tiki bar downtown, and introduced them to the wonderful world of those drinks. All in all, a great day, but by the end of it I was just exhausted.
This week is going to be kind of busy. I need to catch up to a few things that have gone unattended for too long at work, and I'll be launching the last new program of the year on Friday. A LOT of work will need to go into that. I think I'll be OK as long as my time management skills and focus are where they need to be, which means I'll be mostly fine and something or other will slip through the cracks.
In addition to the Writing Masterclass, I've been watching journaling guide videos on YouTube. There's a whole corner of the site dedicated to those living a "stoic's lifestyle", and there's actually a lot of good advice there. I'm not sure where the philosophy actually leads, but at least for the purpose of journaling the ideas are solid.
"Meditations" by Marcus Aurelius seems to be the north star for this group, and a lot of the advice given is derived from that text. The idea is to take the big ideas (your purpose in life, your ideals) and view them through the lends of your daily activities. As you reflect on your activities from day to day, you gradually see where your actions don't align, why they don't, and what you'll need to do to change them. Sounds like a pretty good idea, right?
So what are my ideals? Are my days filled with actions that get me closer to the life my ideals indicate? Where am I falling down?
When I think about what my ideals are, my mind goes blank. The fallout of 2016 has made it difficult for me to see how anyone could think objective ideals are feasible; I guess I now believe that the best we can do is react to the world around us in ways that make it better. I'm not sure we can build a world in which everyone is heard, that disagreements are respectful, that our fundamental desires are selfless instead of selfish. I think that we can build ourselves towards that as individuals, but...I don't really have hope for a Star Trek future.
So what sort of person do I want to be for this reality? I think, when I'm at my best, I'm filled to bursting with love and gratitude for the life I have. I want to spend more time and energy on being appreciative of what I have and who I love, and I want to spend more time trying to transmit that sense of contentment. Ultimately I'd like to live a simpler life, where I can accept whatever comes my way without necessarily being influenced by it. I'd like my focus to be a bit more humble, so that I can be happy and speak about happiness no matter what else is going on. I'd like to be more stable, more equanimous, a calm and still refuge in a turbulent world.
So what gets me there? Doing/wanting less, but doing/wanting deeply. I know that I've likely lived more of my life now than I have ahead of me, and I want the years I have left to be filled with a quiet, joyous wisdom. I'd like to plumb my experiences and use what I've learned to improve myself, to talk about that improvement in ways that inspire other people.
That means getting swept up in whatever social-media controversy happens my way a lot less often. Or spending time on relatively vapid topics, like celebrity news (an admitted guilty pleasure of mine). With a lot of habitual time-wasters, it might be a good idea to ask myself "Does this spark joy or wisdom?". If the answer is no, then it's a good idea to reconsider what I'm doing.
Just when I think I'm feeling better, there's another coughing fit or another three gallons to evacuate from my nose. Breath isn't coming much easier, either, so that's no good. The only bright side is I hear it's been going around so there's a lot of sympathy and well-wishes. Everyone knows that you don't need COVID to have a fun time being sick. ;)
Despite that, it was a busy weekend! The trip to Gyu-Kaku was fun, though I think it's a style of eating best suited to smaller numbers. Even though there was only five of us, it was a little chaotic making sure all the cuts of meat were cooked to everyone's liking and that folks got full. I had a pretty good selection of beef, chicken, and garlic noodles -- but if it were up to me I would have had more!
The D&D game was really good, unexpectedly intense. The group has collected a general associated with the red dragon's army because we know he's connected to the abduction of many other dragonborn eggs(?) who were also born during the time of the Comet. Hildegaard, our dragonborn fighter, revealed that she grew up with him a long time ago, decided she would have none of Redrogomore's regime, and carved out her own path. It's possible that she was getting through to him before we realized we were being ambushed!
My character, the gnome rogue, immediately went to kill the prisoner -- which, it turns out, is not what the rest of the party wanted. It also set the trust-meter back quite a ways. However, the rest of the party cut his bonds, healed him up, and helped him escape while the dragon's army called him out as a traitor and demanded us to give him up so he could face justice. In the end, a few members of the party were taken into custody. A rescue/breakout session is on deck for next time!
On Sunday we hosted a few friends from out of town. We took them to a dispensary, which they loved, and The Counter -- a local burger joint that lets you "craft your own burger" from a list of options. Always a great time, nearly-impossible to make a bad burger if you know what you're doing. We took them to Dr. Funk, a tiki bar downtown, and introduced them to the wonderful world of those drinks. All in all, a great day, but by the end of it I was just exhausted.
This week is going to be kind of busy. I need to catch up to a few things that have gone unattended for too long at work, and I'll be launching the last new program of the year on Friday. A LOT of work will need to go into that. I think I'll be OK as long as my time management skills and focus are where they need to be, which means I'll be mostly fine and something or other will slip through the cracks.
In addition to the Writing Masterclass, I've been watching journaling guide videos on YouTube. There's a whole corner of the site dedicated to those living a "stoic's lifestyle", and there's actually a lot of good advice there. I'm not sure where the philosophy actually leads, but at least for the purpose of journaling the ideas are solid.
"Meditations" by Marcus Aurelius seems to be the north star for this group, and a lot of the advice given is derived from that text. The idea is to take the big ideas (your purpose in life, your ideals) and view them through the lends of your daily activities. As you reflect on your activities from day to day, you gradually see where your actions don't align, why they don't, and what you'll need to do to change them. Sounds like a pretty good idea, right?
So what are my ideals? Are my days filled with actions that get me closer to the life my ideals indicate? Where am I falling down?
When I think about what my ideals are, my mind goes blank. The fallout of 2016 has made it difficult for me to see how anyone could think objective ideals are feasible; I guess I now believe that the best we can do is react to the world around us in ways that make it better. I'm not sure we can build a world in which everyone is heard, that disagreements are respectful, that our fundamental desires are selfless instead of selfish. I think that we can build ourselves towards that as individuals, but...I don't really have hope for a Star Trek future.
So what sort of person do I want to be for this reality? I think, when I'm at my best, I'm filled to bursting with love and gratitude for the life I have. I want to spend more time and energy on being appreciative of what I have and who I love, and I want to spend more time trying to transmit that sense of contentment. Ultimately I'd like to live a simpler life, where I can accept whatever comes my way without necessarily being influenced by it. I'd like my focus to be a bit more humble, so that I can be happy and speak about happiness no matter what else is going on. I'd like to be more stable, more equanimous, a calm and still refuge in a turbulent world.
So what gets me there? Doing/wanting less, but doing/wanting deeply. I know that I've likely lived more of my life now than I have ahead of me, and I want the years I have left to be filled with a quiet, joyous wisdom. I'd like to plumb my experiences and use what I've learned to improve myself, to talk about that improvement in ways that inspire other people.
That means getting swept up in whatever social-media controversy happens my way a lot less often. Or spending time on relatively vapid topics, like celebrity news (an admitted guilty pleasure of mine). With a lot of habitual time-wasters, it might be a good idea to ask myself "Does this spark joy or wisdom?". If the answer is no, then it's a good idea to reconsider what I'm doing.
