The Wheel Keeps Turning
Jan. 1st, 2008 09:49 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
jakebe
Happy 2008!
We spent last night with a relatively modest celebration. We drank wine, we watched The Boondocks and The Prize Winner of Defiance, Ohio (which is an absolutely amazing movie, by the way; even 50s suburban housewives have Buddha-nature) and played a game or two of cribbage. My desktop computer's power supply is also apparently a goner, which inspired a chain of swaps that lead to a total Frankensteining of a new computer. We're continuing that project today.
Last year was a pretty good one for me. I slipped in a few ways, but I made significant progress in other ones. I got a great deal more organized, thanks in part to my job with Adobe. I'm also learning (quickly) how to deal with sources of external stress. ;) There are some times when I feel like a rat in a wheel, and I'm not sure how I feel about that. I do like the fact that my job is challenging, and that I've been largely meeting that challenge fairly well. I've got mad multitasking skills, yo! Still, there's a lot to learn. I think I can perfect my position in 2008; which means being able to do it awesomely without feeling too harried. This means being to relax when you're incredibly busy, which is nothing less than a fine art.
I have a few resolutions for this year. People, I've noticed, don't seem to do too well when there's a specific goal to meet, so I thought I would keep a lot of them idealized; just something to keep in mind while I'm careening through the months towards December.
Ideals
1. Be less afraid - This is the big thing. Rabbit teaches the lesson of what to do with fear, how to deal with a big frightening world, and I've been making progress there. There's still so much to do there, though; I've been largely quiet with folks because I'm afraid of how I'll sound when I make an earnest attempt to communicate. Sometimes my thoughts are nothing more than a big jumble of random ideas and images that have obscure connections that make sense to me, and I'm comfortable in that space because I've inhabited it for so long. Oddly enough, I haven't had the kinds of relationships where people are necessarily interested in getting into all of that messy stuff with me. Now I'm developing them, and the process of opening up is well...scary. I'm incredibly thankful that I have people where I finally feel I can be as disorganized, hazy and stupid as I have the potential of being, and they won't run away. It's learning to have faith in that that will be a focus of this next year.
2. Indulge my curiosity - The world is an incredible place, and there's so *much* to be curious about. Have you ever wondered how the cotton plant is turned into a shirt? I'm fascinated by the process of creation, in all of its forms, and I don't think I indulge that fascination nearly enough. If you don't exercise your interest in the world around you, the world around you starts to seem like a duller, less interesting place. It's time to brighten up.
3. Be more present - Every moment is unique, blah blah blah Buddhist crap. But it's true. :) I've made really good strides with treating every moment in the moment it's in, but there's always improvement, you know?
4. Think better of people. - I'm not disdainful of people per se, but if you trip one of my pet peeves, or indulge in an attitude that I'm not fond of...man, you're on my shit list and it's hard to get off of it. I just want to hold less grudges, I suppose, and give people the benefit of the doubt more often. Also, trying to take offensive behavior less personally.
5. Give more. - I can be selfish. I'm really paranoid about this, but I am fully capable of finding ways to get what I want. I use them more often than I would care to admit. When I get right down to it, I can be incredibly inward. I want to give more of myself to the world; more of my time, patience, whatever.
Specifics
1. Learn to drive.
2. Write every day.
3. Meditate every day.
4. Learn French.
5. Learn a musical instrument. Preferrably the clarinet (previous experience), the piano (the easiest?), the violin (the prettiest).
6. Exercise at least three times per week.
In other news, my calendar for 2008 is Nuns Having Fun. I've had the calendar before, and it's just awesome. Maxim(!) calls it "habit-forming." Even manly men's magazines can't resist a clever pun here and there. Anyway, if your religion isn't making you smile more often, then something's wrong.
We spent last night with a relatively modest celebration. We drank wine, we watched The Boondocks and The Prize Winner of Defiance, Ohio (which is an absolutely amazing movie, by the way; even 50s suburban housewives have Buddha-nature) and played a game or two of cribbage. My desktop computer's power supply is also apparently a goner, which inspired a chain of swaps that lead to a total Frankensteining of a new computer. We're continuing that project today.
Last year was a pretty good one for me. I slipped in a few ways, but I made significant progress in other ones. I got a great deal more organized, thanks in part to my job with Adobe. I'm also learning (quickly) how to deal with sources of external stress. ;) There are some times when I feel like a rat in a wheel, and I'm not sure how I feel about that. I do like the fact that my job is challenging, and that I've been largely meeting that challenge fairly well. I've got mad multitasking skills, yo! Still, there's a lot to learn. I think I can perfect my position in 2008; which means being able to do it awesomely without feeling too harried. This means being to relax when you're incredibly busy, which is nothing less than a fine art.
I have a few resolutions for this year. People, I've noticed, don't seem to do too well when there's a specific goal to meet, so I thought I would keep a lot of them idealized; just something to keep in mind while I'm careening through the months towards December.
Ideals
1. Be less afraid - This is the big thing. Rabbit teaches the lesson of what to do with fear, how to deal with a big frightening world, and I've been making progress there. There's still so much to do there, though; I've been largely quiet with folks because I'm afraid of how I'll sound when I make an earnest attempt to communicate. Sometimes my thoughts are nothing more than a big jumble of random ideas and images that have obscure connections that make sense to me, and I'm comfortable in that space because I've inhabited it for so long. Oddly enough, I haven't had the kinds of relationships where people are necessarily interested in getting into all of that messy stuff with me. Now I'm developing them, and the process of opening up is well...scary. I'm incredibly thankful that I have people where I finally feel I can be as disorganized, hazy and stupid as I have the potential of being, and they won't run away. It's learning to have faith in that that will be a focus of this next year.
2. Indulge my curiosity - The world is an incredible place, and there's so *much* to be curious about. Have you ever wondered how the cotton plant is turned into a shirt? I'm fascinated by the process of creation, in all of its forms, and I don't think I indulge that fascination nearly enough. If you don't exercise your interest in the world around you, the world around you starts to seem like a duller, less interesting place. It's time to brighten up.
3. Be more present - Every moment is unique, blah blah blah Buddhist crap. But it's true. :) I've made really good strides with treating every moment in the moment it's in, but there's always improvement, you know?
4. Think better of people. - I'm not disdainful of people per se, but if you trip one of my pet peeves, or indulge in an attitude that I'm not fond of...man, you're on my shit list and it's hard to get off of it. I just want to hold less grudges, I suppose, and give people the benefit of the doubt more often. Also, trying to take offensive behavior less personally.
5. Give more. - I can be selfish. I'm really paranoid about this, but I am fully capable of finding ways to get what I want. I use them more often than I would care to admit. When I get right down to it, I can be incredibly inward. I want to give more of myself to the world; more of my time, patience, whatever.
Specifics
1. Learn to drive.
2. Write every day.
3. Meditate every day.
4. Learn French.
5. Learn a musical instrument. Preferrably the clarinet (previous experience), the piano (the easiest?), the violin (the prettiest).
6. Exercise at least three times per week.
In other news, my calendar for 2008 is Nuns Having Fun. I've had the calendar before, and it's just awesome. Maxim(!) calls it "habit-forming." Even manly men's magazines can't resist a clever pun here and there. Anyway, if your religion isn't making you smile more often, then something's wrong.
