Failing Not to Cry
May. 27th, 2003 10:26 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
jakebe
Hey there, all...
The Universe had it out for me the past couple days. The Iron Giant played on Cartoon Network yesterday, and![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
arlekin came downstairs last night to give me this book, The Perks of Being a Wallflower.
It honestly doesn't take much to make me cry...well, it takes a lot less than most people I know. Most of the time, I cry when I see something incredibly beautiful or pure. I don't know why, but it fills me with...something, until it hurts, and I can't take it any more, and I cry. Personally, I *love* it when something makes me cry. My movie collection is full of things like that.
The Universe had it out for me the past couple days. The Iron Giant played on Cartoon Network yesterday, and
arlekin came downstairs last night to give me this book, The Perks of Being a Wallflower.It honestly doesn't take much to make me cry...well, it takes a lot less than most people I know. Most of the time, I cry when I see something incredibly beautiful or pure. I don't know why, but it fills me with...something, until it hurts, and I can't take it any more, and I cry. Personally, I *love* it when something makes me cry. My movie collection is full of things like that.
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Hey there, all...
The Universe had it out for me the past couple days. <i>The Iron Giant</i> played on Cartoon Network yesterday, and <user site="livejournal.com" user="arlekin"> came downstairs last night to give me this book, <i>The Perks of Being a Wallflower</i>.
It honestly doesn't take much to make me cry...well, it takes a lot less than most people I know. Most of the time, I cry when I see something incredibly beautiful or pure. I don't know why, but it fills me with...something, until it hurts, and I can't take it any more, and I cry. Personally, I *love* it when something makes me cry. My movie collection is full of things like that. <:)
Anyway, <i>The Iron Giant</i>, the first time I saw it, made me literally...shake and cry in front of a roomfull of people I was snowed in with. Just thinking about it makes me want to cry. It's a beautiful movie. This book is incredible, too...it's so simple, but very pointed, so you can see through all the bullshit of your own perception into the current that lies underneath things. That kind of clear vision is amazing to me.
I really don't think I experience enough. To be completely honest, I have a pretty thin skin, and I hide from people a whole lot. There are only three people I really feel comfortable enough to tell everything to, and two of them are on-line...which is why I'm at my computer so much. Lately I've become aware of just how far I've retreated.
The idea of being a wallflower appeals to me quite a bit, but I think it's one of those things that's adolescent-specific. Eventually, you can't straddle the fence of watching the world but not being a part of it any more, or at least it becomes a lot more difficult. Sooner or later you get self-absorbed, and muddling through your own shit makes you lose that kind of clear vision. Or, you start getting social, and everyone else's shit gets too close to see clearly.
I have a hard time accepting people as they are, especially when it's hurtful to me, but I suppose that's a pretty natural thing. I've kind of adopted the policy of "OK, you can be who you are and I'll accept that. I'll just accept it from way over there." I'm not really sure that's the best policy to take.
So, I think, I need to step out of my own bullshit and see the world a bit more. You can't gain very much wisdom hiding behind a computer screen.
The Universe had it out for me the past couple days. <i>The Iron Giant</i> played on Cartoon Network yesterday, and <user site="livejournal.com" user="arlekin"> came downstairs last night to give me this book, <i>The Perks of Being a Wallflower</i>.
It honestly doesn't take much to make me cry...well, it takes a lot less than most people I know. Most of the time, I cry when I see something incredibly beautiful or pure. I don't know why, but it fills me with...something, until it hurts, and I can't take it any more, and I cry. Personally, I *love* it when something makes me cry. My movie collection is full of things like that. <:)
Anyway, <i>The Iron Giant</i>, the first time I saw it, made me literally...shake and cry in front of a roomfull of people I was snowed in with. Just thinking about it makes me want to cry. It's a beautiful movie. This book is incredible, too...it's so simple, but very pointed, so you can see through all the bullshit of your own perception into the current that lies underneath things. That kind of clear vision is amazing to me.
I really don't think I experience enough. To be completely honest, I have a pretty thin skin, and I hide from people a whole lot. There are only three people I really feel comfortable enough to tell everything to, and two of them are on-line...which is why I'm at my computer so much. Lately I've become aware of just how far I've retreated.
The idea of being a wallflower appeals to me quite a bit, but I think it's one of those things that's adolescent-specific. Eventually, you can't straddle the fence of watching the world but not being a part of it any more, or at least it becomes a lot more difficult. Sooner or later you get self-absorbed, and muddling through your own shit makes you lose that kind of clear vision. Or, you start getting social, and everyone else's shit gets too close to see clearly.
I have a hard time accepting people as they are, especially when it's hurtful to me, but I suppose that's a pretty natural thing. I've kind of adopted the policy of "OK, you can be who you are and I'll accept that. I'll just accept it from way over there." I'm not really sure that's the best policy to take.
So, I think, I need to step out of my own bullshit and see the world a bit more. You can't gain very much wisdom hiding behind a computer screen.
