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Yesterday I got a lot done on my to-do list! They were mostly "small ticket" items, but you have to start somewhere. I had been hoping to steal 15 minutes here and there to do one thing before moving on to work or whatever should be taking my focus, but it didn't quite work out that way for some reason. Still, it was a promising start.
My finances are...still not great, but they're mostly-recovered from last year. I've gotten myself into a position where each quarter of the month has its own expenses, and for these three months it's a bunch of annual subscriptions I haven't turned off for some reason. I tend to think of these as "aspirational" subscriptions, the kinds of services that would be used by my best self. Yes, I *should* read the Washington Post daily. Yeah, I really could get a lot of use out of the additional features from MyFitnessPal and Runkeeper. Oh, and I can't forget to support the great community of gurus over on Insight Timer!
While I signed up for these services with the best intentions, it also feels like these services have become burdensome. When the bill comes due for these, I usually feel a twinge of shame over "wasting" money I couldn't afford to waste. I try to remind myself to start building a more consistent habit and, for a while, I do. But then my focus wanders elsewhere, or the effort required to build the habit is a demand I suddenly can't meet for weeks at a time and that's that. It's all forgotten until the next time the bill rolls around.
I get the feeling that these "forgotten subscriptions" are costing me a pretty penny. When I was making more, I could overlook that with the knowledge I'm supporting good work so even if I'm not using it I'm helping them stay afloat. But now that my budget is so much smaller and I have to plan ahead for things like a biannual insurance payment, it hurts a bit more when there's an "unexpected" $80 charge for a service I barely use.
I've recently signed up for Rocket Money, which says it can take a look at your subscriptions on a holistic level to offer discounts or advice. I might turn to them and see if I can get a full list of subscriptions I'm paying. Then, I can dismiss the services that don't spark joy for me and make a calendar or something for the rest.
Several things I've read and experienced over the past few weeks have put me in a minimalist mood all over again. I mean, it's not just the past few weeks. It feels like everywhere I go online or in-person, there's something incentivizing you to sign up for something, join a program, etc. It's all geared toward helping others, or joining a community, or benefiting you in some way but really it's a play for your attention, your resources, your time. Maybe it's because I'm getting older, but I'm increasingly losing patience with institutions that are so intent on disrupting the flow of my day. As an older gentleman with ADHD, my attention is precious and I devote a lot of resources to laying down the most productive track for my train of thought. When it gets derailed because someone wants to sell me something I don't need it's mildly infurating. And then anxiety-inducing. And then overwhelming.
It's a constant onslaught. If I'm reading an article, I can't just read the article. I have to mute the video that either pops up or loads right on the page, click away from pop-up ads asking me to subscribe to a newsletter or pay for better access, find a way around the anti-ad-blocker, etc. etc. Quality information or helpful, insightful material is buried under so much shit I can't just focus on that. I have to fight through a jungle of trash just to do anything.
So it's no wonder I feel like I can't focus, or that I'm harried constantly from all sides -- because I am. And as far as I know there's almost nothing I can do to stop that. The Internet is in the hands of giant companies who make money by making sure you get all the ads you can stomach and a few you can't. And it sucks that it's so much work just to cut the crap out of your life in order to focus on the important stuff, but it is.
Anyway, it's time to seriously examine a lot of the stuff around me and start cutting it loose if it no longer serves. I'll have to write this down, come to think of it, and see about making it more of a focus in April.
My finances are...still not great, but they're mostly-recovered from last year. I've gotten myself into a position where each quarter of the month has its own expenses, and for these three months it's a bunch of annual subscriptions I haven't turned off for some reason. I tend to think of these as "aspirational" subscriptions, the kinds of services that would be used by my best self. Yes, I *should* read the Washington Post daily. Yeah, I really could get a lot of use out of the additional features from MyFitnessPal and Runkeeper. Oh, and I can't forget to support the great community of gurus over on Insight Timer!
While I signed up for these services with the best intentions, it also feels like these services have become burdensome. When the bill comes due for these, I usually feel a twinge of shame over "wasting" money I couldn't afford to waste. I try to remind myself to start building a more consistent habit and, for a while, I do. But then my focus wanders elsewhere, or the effort required to build the habit is a demand I suddenly can't meet for weeks at a time and that's that. It's all forgotten until the next time the bill rolls around.
I get the feeling that these "forgotten subscriptions" are costing me a pretty penny. When I was making more, I could overlook that with the knowledge I'm supporting good work so even if I'm not using it I'm helping them stay afloat. But now that my budget is so much smaller and I have to plan ahead for things like a biannual insurance payment, it hurts a bit more when there's an "unexpected" $80 charge for a service I barely use.
I've recently signed up for Rocket Money, which says it can take a look at your subscriptions on a holistic level to offer discounts or advice. I might turn to them and see if I can get a full list of subscriptions I'm paying. Then, I can dismiss the services that don't spark joy for me and make a calendar or something for the rest.
Several things I've read and experienced over the past few weeks have put me in a minimalist mood all over again. I mean, it's not just the past few weeks. It feels like everywhere I go online or in-person, there's something incentivizing you to sign up for something, join a program, etc. It's all geared toward helping others, or joining a community, or benefiting you in some way but really it's a play for your attention, your resources, your time. Maybe it's because I'm getting older, but I'm increasingly losing patience with institutions that are so intent on disrupting the flow of my day. As an older gentleman with ADHD, my attention is precious and I devote a lot of resources to laying down the most productive track for my train of thought. When it gets derailed because someone wants to sell me something I don't need it's mildly infurating. And then anxiety-inducing. And then overwhelming.
It's a constant onslaught. If I'm reading an article, I can't just read the article. I have to mute the video that either pops up or loads right on the page, click away from pop-up ads asking me to subscribe to a newsletter or pay for better access, find a way around the anti-ad-blocker, etc. etc. Quality information or helpful, insightful material is buried under so much shit I can't just focus on that. I have to fight through a jungle of trash just to do anything.
So it's no wonder I feel like I can't focus, or that I'm harried constantly from all sides -- because I am. And as far as I know there's almost nothing I can do to stop that. The Internet is in the hands of giant companies who make money by making sure you get all the ads you can stomach and a few you can't. And it sucks that it's so much work just to cut the crap out of your life in order to focus on the important stuff, but it is.
Anyway, it's time to seriously examine a lot of the stuff around me and start cutting it loose if it no longer serves. I'll have to write this down, come to think of it, and see about making it more of a focus in April.
